So, occassionally I will get a bee in my bonnet about a particular actor and go on a fevered quest for everything they’ve ever been in, which is how I end up paying eight thousand dollars for a VHS of The Linguini Incident, and paying a small smuggling operation to get me a copy of I Am Dina to round out my collection of weird-ass Marie Bonnevie movies.

A while back, I got caught up with Queer as Folk (UK) and fell like a sack of bricks for Aidan Gillen. In a fit of glee, I bought up everything of him that I could. “Why,” said I, “if he’s that good in this role, he must have amazing taste in movie parts!”

So I bought Lorna Doone. Used. Which, I would like to point out, is five dollars I will never see again.

(Later, I found out in an interview that Aidan Gillen takes roles based on where they’re being filmed, so he can see different parts of the world, something I wish he’d have let me know before I spent my five dollars.)

I Abridged it. It’s a little over five minutes, down from two and a half hours that feel like five hours. Five, like my dollars.