So, last night was the Ice Dancing Free Dance, which sounds a little but like everyone let go of earthly cares and blissfully flew over the ice for four minutes.

I am joking. This was a seriously earthly care. Backstage couples were clearly straining to hear that someone screwed up. (To be fair, this was a possibility. The ice dancing finals last time looked like last week’s men’s finals; skaters kept hitting vegetable oil and going down.) Luckily, no contenders fell, so there wasn’t that horrible, unmistakable sound of 10,000 people suddenly become your mom, disappointed but knowing you tried So Hard.

There was only one instance of that sound, and it came from me when I realized that Belbin and Agosto weren’t going to medal, even though their performance was more mature and expressive than the team that edged them out. (The team who won bronze had rope belts that he used as an assist in their lifts/tricks; the announcer mentioned they’d have to make this illegal, since it was clearly a performance aid. But apparently everything works once, and they got a bronze.)

By far the best were Virtue and Moir, whose gorgeous dance earned them gold. Little-known fact, though:

(They are SO WHOLESOME. When they got home, bluebirds swooped down from the sky to lift their medals off.)