1. At some point, I will have to take the plunge and start using my Twitter. I keep going to the point of logging on and then shrinking back as if from crystal meth.

2. If someone like Junot Diaz ever blurbs MY book as “Cool as fuck,” I will tattoo those words. On someone else. (I don’t like pain. Plus, when you’re cool as fuck, people do what you want!)

3. Spring is coming; the guy whose backyard backs up to my building is out in his plastic chair, barefoot, shirt open, reading the paper. I also know this as “that time of year when I keep my blinds closed all the time.”

4. The exhibit book that accompanies the Gothic fashion exhibit contains about fifteen photos of material actually in the exhibit. The exhibit had something like seventy-five pieces. There will be more about this.

5. In better gown news, Megan Mylan’s mother stopped by my Oscar dress post to give me the details on her daughter’s Oscar dress, which was designed by Megan’s grandmother, who went to the Pratt Institute as a fashion illustrator. Megan promised to wear it if she ever got nominated. Basically, it is the coolest, sweetest thing ever. For once I have used the internet for good, and not for evil!

This is the runway version of Marisa Tomei’s dress from the Oscars:

And I stared at it for about thirty seconds before I finally figured out what it reminded me of!

It reminds me of a very sharp-edged and postmodern take on Mina’s red dinner dress from Dracula, which I saw recently at the Gothic exhibit at FIT.

Man, do I love pleats.

So, Melissa Leo Day (otherwise known as the Oscars) happened last night! Let’s get right to the fashion.

Melissa Leo did not win. This was not a surprise (it was Winslet’s year and everyone knew it), but by the time it happened I felt like it was for the best, because as awesome as I think Melissa Leo is, I did not necessarily want to see her dress again.

Young lady, what are you WEARING?
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Disclaimer: I don’t care about Valentine’s Day except that it gives me a chance to make a list post. I am the Switzerland of Valentine’s day. (Unless people ask me if I’m excited for my “name day,” and then I sigh, because seriously, that joke was old in fourth grade, it’s old now.)

- Michael Fassbender. You inexplicably turn me all caps, big guy. Can’t wait to see you in your disastrous Wuthering Heights next year.

- Star Fleet wallets. I am the bird! (God, did I ever leave the house as an adolescent? Don’t answer that.)

- Family and friends. Dear Mom, I love you so much. Sorry I’m not changing my name. Apologize to Grandma for me.

- Fassbender, my portable computer. It allows me to be rude in public whenever I want.

- My TV. It took away the dialogue track for this week’s Eleventh Hour. It was amazing. Graeme Revell, one of my favorite composers, gave me a little concert, and I got to see the worst arch-enemy arc in recent memory. See for yourself at Tor.com!

ETA: And I never have to watch another episode of Dollhouse now that I turned in my opinion piece to Fantasy, which makes this day practically Thanksgiving!

So, the Golden Globes happened, and people declared undying love for their costars and their pets, but let’s face it, it’s all about the red carpet.

I seriously hated 90% of the dresses this time, so I am not even doing a worst-of (well, with one exception, but she’s hateful and deserves it), so this is a random collection of looks I really liked.

Best Color: Rumer Willis, which shows how bad this red carpet was; I mean, Rumer Willis is not really a bastion of good taste under normal circumstances, but you gotta give the girl credit for being the only one on the red carpet in this color, which could not be said of electric blue or runny-egg yellow, which were just EVERYWHERE, which – people, you pay your stylists to make you look GOOD. Don’t let them just mess with you!

Ahem.

Clearly this ranty dress collection is not for the bandwidth-thrifty.
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