I was asked to write up a thoughtful, incisive con report on WisCon 33 for Fantasy Magazine.

This is what they got instead.

Still sad that I couldn’t use my original response for the “Dealing With Your Male Answer Syndrome” panel, which was, “Well, I have a solution for that,” but it always looked very “Men should shut up” when it was supposed to look like Male Answer Syndrome in the wild, so in the end I cut it for clarity.

Also, though it may seem like strange news, I wrote up the bacontini, because PEOPLE ACTUALLY DRANK IT. I could not believe my eyes. Why would you drink something with cheese on the outside? Why? (Lookin’ at you, !) Answer: WisCon madness.

/Pokemon

This year at WisCon I participated on the Netbook Show and Tell panel as the plug-and-play representative. For those who know their programming, it was an informative panel. For those who are a little more, uh, Luddite, it was a hilarious panel; I’m pretty sure that at some point in the melee, someone recalibrated their warp drive for endothermic propulsion.

People were very generous about showing off their netbooks and going through the pros and cons. I’ve done a layperson’s roundup over at Tor.com..

Hopefully this is just the beginning of my WisCon recapping, but I went back to the day job this morning after letting work build up in my absence, and oh, that’s always fun! (More later, is what I’m saying. Because this place is wild today.)

Which makes me sound like Waldo, but worse things have happened. That guy knew what cool was long before Harry Potter showed up with his poser glasses.

May 16: I will be appearing on Hour of the Wolf with . I will be reading my story from his Federations anthology, and we will be talking shit about Star Trek. Luckily, since I think we’re both pretty pro-Picard, it won’t devolve into half-asleep protests of Kirk’s awesomeness accompanied by the sound of exhausted shoulder-punches.

May 20mumble-25: I’ll be at WisCon! I have one panel scheduled, on netbooks, which is hilarious considering the battery in my Acer just choked and died. That’ll be a fun panel.

July 9-12: Readercon! I am already preparing nutritional supplements to take with me, since this hotel is sorely lacking in vegetarian foodstuffs, and I had to keep asking for cheeseburgers with no meat. (Dear waitstaff of the world: I know, and I’m sorry, but seriously, if there’s no grilled cheese option then I am at a loss.) I will be bringing Powerbars or something now that I know the culinary situation. That won’t look dorky at all! *facepalm*