My short story “A Brief Investigation of the Process of Decay” is up at Strange Horizons today!

I’m fond of this one, and I hope you enjoy.

Over at Fantasy Magazine today, I talk about the movie Legend, and how despite its many missteps (piss off, Tom Cruise), Lily is kind of awesome.

And if you’re so inspired, costume-wise, may I recommend:

It’s pretty darn close to the original, no?

(I’m secretly really excited about this! Did Legend get really cool again and no one told me? Because I have a sweatshirt with a unicorn on the front and the MOMENT Legend is back, I’m wearing that shit.)

(Also, obviously the dark Lily costume is way better, but I think that’s a lot of engineering for a Simplicity pattern to tackle. No one wants to turn that pattern over and under Notions see “Chicken Wire, Buckram, Rhinestones [100,000].”)

And finally, a picture I couldn’t resist, via the amazing The Costumer’s Guide:

Nice job capturing the moment, continuity Polaroid!

So, Damian Lewis (an amazing British actor who came to America’s attention after Band of Brothers and Life) is in a stage play with Keira Knightley. He’s also a diplomat. When asked what he thought of Keira’s acting, he said:

Damian Lewis is positive that Keira Knightley will do a terrific job when she makes her debut on the West End stage.

…”She’s got quite a successful acting dad and playwright mum, so she can handle herself – Keira is fabulous, she’s an absolute sweetheart – she’s looking forward to it as well so we’re going to have fun,” he said.

1. Dude, that is MASTERFUL.

2. That is exactly how I feel about Keira Knightley, and many other actors of her ilk. People try the “But she seems so nice!” angle, and that’s hard to argue – Keira was in a domestic-violence awareness promo, she doesn’t stagger around drunk a lot, she seems nice. That doesn’t mean she can ACT, though! She is a bad actor! This is the profession she chose, and it’s sort of her duty to be good at it, you know? People don’t continue to hire shitty accountants.

(Liv Tyler is another one. She’s a very sweet person and a good citizen and everything, but girl cannot emote to SAVE her LIFE. And Natalie Portman, who sometimes shows promise but can easily go through three movies in a year without acting even once! Sean Penn, Al Pacino, Angelina Jolie…you know what, this list will end up being eight hundred people long. I’m stopping.)

ANYWAY, I feel the same way about some of the Game of Thrones cast (which is nearly finalized, and which I wrote up for Tor.com yesterday). Going down the names, which is like Awesome British Actor Camp Varsity, it’s like, “Yes! Check! Check! Awesome! Go! Great one!…wait, really?”

I like Lena Headey as Sarah Connor, I do. I just don’t know if she’s so hot in the period-piece arena. A lot of actors aren’t, and that’s fine, but sometimes an actor doesn’t know that until it’s too late and they’re like Ray Liotta in the Dungeon Siege movie, you know? That hurts everyone.

I do not have a single icon of architecture or a skyline. That needs to be rectified pronto, I think.

In the meantime, my short story “Light on the Water” is up at Fantasy Magazine! It’s about buildings in love.

Over at Tor.com, I wrote about four reasons to watch League of Extraordinary Gentlemen as part of any steampunk immersion. Sure, one of those reasons is just to witness its horribleness, but I think we all know that I believe that suffering through bad movies builds character.

I will say that the movie is remarkable quotable for something that is, in general, so bloodless and banal. I think Stuart Townsend steals the show when, during Dorian Gray’s fight with the vampiric Mina Harker, he moans, “We’ll be at this ALL DAY,” with the sort of over-the-top ennui that you rarely see in good movies.* It’s the sort of make-the-best-of-it feel that only comes from realizing you are cast in one of the shittiest movies of the year. I salute you, brave b-movie veterans!

(Please note that this movie is an example of a particular subculture; Movies with Richard Roxburgh Running. He’s the best runner in Hollywood. Yes, I’m serious. Yes, this is the kind of thing I think about.**)

* This is wonderful when you’re stuck in department meetings. Just imagine him busting in, dropping that line, and swanning right back out.

** Best example – Mission: Impossible II, the scene as he’s stealing the vials, running through the dark hallway. It’s so effortless!